Bridesmaids Duties

This is not the usual list! It is one I've assembled by observation rather than "studied" or found in a book on wedding etiquette. One thing I am certain of: the friend you picked has seen an almighty change in your personality!

She has watched as her fun loving vodka and Red Bull slugging best mate has left forever. You've become a "Bride" - how close to Bridezilla you've become is her secret opinion; so don't ask!

Here are my tips to the Chief Bridesmaid:

• If asked an opinion be as diplomatic as possible; the truth hurts but looking an eejit on the Altar lasts a life time; so when delivering a verdict, be very careful!

• Calm her down. Talk her out of kicking her mother in the shins; advise her that cursing the Reception Venue staff won't do anybody any good.

• You will probably be asked to go with the bride to the various wedding shows and dress shopping for her wedding dress as well as the Bridesmaid Dresses. You will often be the substitute for the bored groom or when he is looking for an escape from the long hours of planning - get used to it – this stuff takes time!

• Try and attend some dress fittings to give your friend some feedback in how the dress looks and fits.

• Plan and arrange the Hen Night: some basics to help you make sure there is lots of alcohol, lots of food and some grubby fun!

• Help with the seating arrangements for the big day. This can be a very difficult process. My tip is to draw the tables on a piece of paper and pencil - then move the names around until you have everyone sitting with the best people. Bring this drawing to the wedding in case there are any mix-ups.

• Keep the Bride fed on her wedding day, as she will forget to eat but remember to drink Champagne and a tipsy nervous bride is not someone you want to see! So make sure she has some breakfast before the day starts, and make sure she gets some dinner at the reception.

• This is vital - assist the bride in getting into her dress and makeup – it makes for better photos!

• Make sure the bride arrives to the ceremony relatively on time – late is fine! Ensure she has everything - gloves, bag, rings, silver coin, the necessary items of blue, borrowed and new.

• Act as a messenger for when the bride wants to communicate with family or the groom (important when leaving to go to the Church so everyone is clued in!).

• Help her out of the car. Straighten everything up before the bride before she takes that Walk. Adjust her hair, straighten her veil, and rearrange her train if needed, and do it again after she arrives at the altar and she is about to sit down.

• Keep the brides bouquet during the ceremony - make sure you have a free hand to adjust the dress.

• Be the witness and sign the marriage certificate.

• Dance with the best man during the first official dance, and dance with the other groomsmen during the following songs too.

And that’s it! Enjoy the day out, knock back the champagne and it’s a great chance to dress up and put on loads of makeup, get the nails and hair done….